You remember them. They were always positioned in the southern corner of the midway. Back where the "snake man" and "two-headed calf" tents were. Small kids had better not be seen in that area of the carnival. It was reserved for adults.
The emcee had a stand in front of the entrance to the tent. The sign said it all..."Girls, Girls, Girls!" About once an hour, he'd bring one of them out on a makeshift stage, fully clothed but slightly bawdy. Most of them had bright red hair and dark red lipstick. The emcee looked like he was born to speak through a microphone, even if he didh't need one.
The summer air was heavy in July. The fair was usually held on the weekend of Independence Day. The fairgounds were in a low lying area and in that back corner the ground was usually soft and mushy, even in the middle of summer. In the evenings as the sun had set and darkness gave way to the bright lights of the traveling carnivals, that corner seemed to have a perpetual fog, which was proper and it seemed to have been placed there on purpose.
As people meandered around the midway, passing the "gamers" and "barkers" wanting them to win their girl friends or wives a teddy bear, and the diesel engine that ran the giant generators that furnished power to the carnival, they would try not to look at the tent in the back. It was impossible but they tried anyhow. To a boy that was about thirteen years old, running with other buddies that were thirteen years old, it was especially difficult not to be drawn by the magic of "that tent!"
The emcee (he was called a "barker") stood on his pedestal, microphone in hand and began his spill...."Hey Men, Hey Boys! We've got a show for the Men and the Big Boys! Come right on down, right on back, right on in.....It's like looking through a bedroom window in Paris 'cept you dont get shot at!" He would then pull back a curtain and bring out one of the girls. She would be fully clothed but would show some "cleavage" (a "no no" in those days) and maybe a "shot of leg" (a MAJOR "no no"). She would dance around the small stage while he continued to provoke and entice another audience. Most of the adult men gathered around weren't men I recognized and I suspect my Mom wouldn't have "relished" the fact I was back there with them."
This particular summer a group of friends and I decided we'd try to get into the Hootchy Kootchy show. I never really had hard evidence of a minimum age requirement but I always assumed it was at least eighteen. I was twelve or thirteen. There were four of us in our group. We fell in line with a group of older men (at least they looked like older men to us - they were probably in their twenties) and proceeded to the entry door.
The emcee (barker) also served as "ticket seller" and "ticket taker." We all tried to look as old as we could. One of our group happened to be wearing a "beanie" and licking on a large lollipop. The barker quickly made him get out of line and wouldn't admit him. The rest of us got in.
Once inside, we tried to orient ourselves without looking too obvious to the older guys. The inside of the tent was very musty and there was a single light bulb hanging overhead in the center. The grass underneath our feet was wet and the ground mushy. Clearly we were in the back of the fairgrounds near the swampy area. All of the older, more experienced men were up toward the front near a 10' x 10' stage that was elevated about 10" off the wet ground. There was a curtain on the back of the stage. We rookies stayed "huddled" together in the center. We still had no idea what to expect.
Pretty soon, the "barker" came inside from the front and approached the stage. He still had the microphone in his hand and it seemed as it was actually an extension of his lip...I mean this guy could not even speak without it. "OK Men, OK Boys" he said, "C'mon down front for the best seat in the house! Tonight, directly from Paris, France, live and in person to dance for you, I proudly present our most popular dancer, Miss Apple Dumpling!" He then turned and moved just offstage where he had a portable record player sitting atop a stool. He quickly lifted the arm and placed in on the vinyl record. It "scratched" and finally some "stripper" music came out it's small speaker. That's when "Apple Dumpling" appeared. She was dressed in a flowing gown (the one she wore out front). As gracefully as she could, she fluttered (that's probably not an accurate description) about the stage. I couldn't help but notice that she sweated just as much as we did. It was, after all, really humid in that tent. It wasn't long into her dance that she removed the outer garments and exposed more cleavage and both legs, which were covered in 3/4 length black stockings. Things were really heating up. As she danced on the front of the stage, she reached out and removed one of the older guys' "steamed up" glasses from his nose and placed them between her breasts. She continued to dance and soon she removed them and placed them back on his nose. They were really "sweaty" now but he didn't seem to mind. He was grinnin' from ear to ear. He only had a couple of teeth. Soon the music stopped (the record had played to it's end) and "Apple Dumpling" went behind the curtain backstage. It was really getting hotter and more humid by the minute by this time.
The "barker" came back on stage and told us that Apple Dumpling had gone back to her dressing room but would still like to show even more flesh. To get her to do this would require another dollar for those willing to remain. There were probably about ten of us altogether in there and all of us fished deeper into our pockets for another dollar. The "barker" flipped the vinyl record over and the music began again. Soon, "Apple Dumpling" re-appeared and started to dance some more. I don't know if the air was heavy or not but breathing was getting harder. Without going into too many details, we stayed for more dancing and finally, after digging into our pockets for the third time, the show finally ended. My buddies and I got a "real education" that night. As we started out, one of the older guys that I happened to know turned around in the doorway and told me my Mother was just outside on the midway. Apparently someone had told her I was in the "Hootch" show. Quickly, I rounded up my other buddies and the three of us climbed under the back of the tent. We scrambled back over the the 8' chain link fence that surrounded the fairgrounds and climbed over it. We were actually "breaking out" of the Fair. When we were on the outside, we trailed along the outside perimeter of the fence and through the swamp. We actually waded in water that was 3' deep in places. There was no telling what creatures were crawling and swimming in that muck but it didn't matter. I couldn't let Mom catch me at the Hootchy-Kootchy show. We "trudged" along for about ten minutes and when we were on the other side of the fairgrounds, we climbed the fence again, this time breaking back into the fair. We found our way back to the midway and to the area where Mom was outside the infamous tent. Sure enough, she was still there. By this time the emcee had brought "Apple Dumpling" back out front and was assembling a new audience. I came up behind her and
placed my hand on her shoulder and said "Mom, what are you doing back here?" She told me that someone had told her they thought they had seen me going into the tent. "Me....Are you kidding? They'd never let me in there! Say, how's about a couple of bucks to go ride some rides?"
I guess she believed me as the subject never came up again.
I remember one year the City Council had some complaint about "Hootch" shows, so they passed a law outlawing them. Apparently this is something that happened from time to time and town to town and the "Carneys" were used to it. When they came into a town that they felt they might get raided and shut down, they simply changed their "Modus Operandi!" They would turn their "Girls, Girls, Girls" sign around and the sign would say "Live, In Person, Straight from the Jungles of Africa, See the APE WOMAN!" Then, instead of bringing "Apple Dumpling" out on stage in a bawdy dress, they would have her put on a leopard-skin outfit (still showing cleavage and legs), tease her hair, put her in a cage and put her on display in the tent. The same "barker" would go out front and change his dialogue to something like, "Hey Men, Hey Boys...Here She is straight from the Jungles, come see the amazing APE WOMAN - Only One Dollah!" The same creepy men who went to the girlie shows each year also paid to see this exhibition, including my buddies and I. This time all four of us made it inside "the tent!" The atmosphere in there was the same as last year's....damp, hot, musty! Once everyone was in place, he rolled back a curtain and there in a cage about 4' cubed was "Apple Dumpling" in her leopard-skin outfit. She gnarled her teeth as she shook the cage for all to see. After a few minutes of this, he replaced the curtain in front of her for the next part of the show. Putting his microphone back up to his mouth, he began his new speech:
"OK Men, OK Boys, you paid one-dollah to see the Ape Woman! Well, there she was...You seen the Woman...Now dig in those pockets and come up with another dollah and we're gonna show you that MONKEY!!!
Mom woulda sure been proud of me that night....and that's the scoop on the Hootchy-Kootchy Show.....From The Inside!
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